Jesus driving me to become a better person
Jesus driving me to become a better person
Luke is completing a 10-month recovery program at The Salvation Army Dooralong Transformation Centre.
I’ve been in addiction close to 17 years.
I grew up in a really good family. I waterskied, and we had things in life that a lot of kids don’t have.
I’m not sure what started my (marijuana) use. I think I was always a bit attracted to the “wild” kids.
I remember my mum saying you shouldn’t hang around this person or that person, they are a bad influence – and she was right.
My drug-taking started recreationally on weekends. I enjoyed it, but soon you find you can’t go a day without it.
For me, marijuana was definitely the “gateway drug”. I honestly believe if I had not started I wouldn’t have gone to other, much heavier drugs.
I did a trade, but the more money I earned, the more I had to spend on drugs and (increasingly) distanced myself from family and friends.
When I was taking drugs I didn’t care if I was hurting my family. Drugs became my only priority in life.
I didn’t care about anything else. It was frightening.
Early in addiction I did my first rehab – just a week – and stayed clean for about three years.
Then my relationship broke down and I went straight back into drug use, probably as a way to deal with my feelings.
Last year, I ended up in trouble with the law and went on the “merit program”, and through that entered The Salvation Army Dooralong Transformation Centre on the NSW Central Coast.
I completed the mandatory three months, but I have stayed on and plan to be here for the full 10-month program.
Dooralong definitely has something that other rehabs don’t, and that’s the spiritual side. Before then, I’d had no Christian/church background except going to church with my nan, when I was about six.
As a grew older, I became the guy standing across the road, looking at all the families going into church and wanting a piece of that, but never actually going in through the doors.
The first chapel at Dooralong was an eye-opener, seeing people singing and worshipping. I was the participant sitting at the back.
These days I am front row – hands in the air.
I’d done a lot of things in my recovery trying to find a higher power and nothing had worked for me.
But being open to Jesus is now what’s driving me to become a better person.
I also go to Northlakes Salvos. It’s a great church and I love worshipping to the Christian rock.
That’s where I feel closest to God – through that worship. We also do a lot of courses including a healthy relationships course and look closely at our own issues through the program.
My family has seen a change. Today I have a really close relationship with my mum and step-dad.
Mum stood by me all the way and she is still my rock. My dream for the future is to retrain now to do something that really helps others.
I recently went home for my three-year-old son’s birthday and just being able to be present and get down on the floor, play games with him, was just beautiful.
That was a natural high! I am trying to be a better man, a better father, a better son and better partner – for my family.
I believe God’s got a plan for me and I am where I am meant to be.
This time last year I was living in my car in addiction, weighing only 48kg and in trouble with the law. The man I am today is completely different to that man.
Comments
Good on you Luke and wishing you all the best/blessings. I have my own demons. Please keep me in your prayers. Thank you.
Good on you Luke and wishing you all the best/blessings. I have my own demons. Please keep me in your prayers. Thank you.